It really does hurt, I never really thought that it would, I tried to pretend I was happy.. but I'm not.. I try to hang with my friends, to forget the awful feeling of not being with a guy, but not even they can help.. I still feel lonely with them.. I try to be around the family, but of course, that's not even close to working, I still feel really lonely and I still feel really hurt..it really does suck.. that I've been through plenty of guys and not one of them actually cared.. maybe a few..maybe one.. maybe.. who knows.. I guess I can give guys "happy endings" but I cant even live one.. T_T..

Ahhh, to be in a guy's arms, as he's holding me, my head is against his chest, as I'm listening to his heart beating.. then and only then I feel like I'm at peace, heaven.. the only source of goodness and joy on earth and we kiss, so much happiness.. they may or may not mean it.. but it feels like they do and I know I do..

Who knows really, the guys i like(d).. nothing really seems to work out..

Am I myself wrong..
something too.. f*cked to be with?

(-__-)

pain.. i feel pain..

I never thought home was such a happy place.. now since I'm home from that T_T ungodly place with that one guy i took off to go see, i am soo happy, he lied about his appearance and a lot of stuff..and just turned out wrong.. i got nothing out of it.. i was sick most of the days i was there.. and now.. i wanna hug everything around me cause i missed it soo much!

Hello I'm James, I am 15, I'm gay and very proud of it, And I am single if you want to know. Every since I was little, I've always had my own imagination, I've always thought I reminded myself of Alice in Alice in Wonderland. I always day dream about things that I would love to happen or just something completely random! I am rather strange.. But I don't try to be tho.. I try to be myself and just have fun! I do love to write and draw.. to get my imagination out! :]

I guess I do have some personal issues, but nothing to hard to deal with, I have had some hard experiences in my life.. from my dad, my cousin, annnd my crushes.. which when asked, I will tell explain later.. I have never liked to be alone.. I always love to be around people.. So, I try my best to hang out with all my friends :] I LOVE to cuddle, so ya, its not my fault I like to hug people!

I love movies, especially horror ones, don't really have a favorite tho :/

As long as I can remember, I've always had the idea of love.. my imagination gone wild ever time I thought of that four lettered word. Always wanted that special someone, even as a kid, I have dreamed about they day I could finally be in someone's arms that cared.. But of course.. still looking and waiting

I think of myself as a hopeless romantic.. Most guys think about sex, sex, sex, sex, sex.. But, (call me old fashioned) I would rather have someone who holds me more then he fucks me :]

This is my story, more should be on the way :]

-James-